1) That he/she deals with citizens that don't respect the law, a badge, the constitution, or innocent people around them ALL DAY LONG.
2) That at least half the people they deal with are drunk, high, half out of their mind, or all 3.
3) That the normal people they deal with are either a) Mad that an officer caught them doing something they shouldn't... or b) Mad that they've had to call an officer out for something that shouldn't have happened.
4) That most of these people they deal with are as the Bible describes the world, out for themselves and very very selfish.
5) I had CHILDREN cuss me like I had stolen their scooter for just stopping to speak to them. Before I couldn't have imagined, even as an adult, speaking to anyone of authority this way.
With all this being said, I will attempt to keep this shorter than my normal "novel" posts, but it probably won't happen. I left the PD because I just wasn't happy. This did not come without some pains though. The friends you develop in this line of work are different than anything I've been familiar with, because I wasn't in the military. These friends watched my back, fought beside me, and filled in when I needed them most. I still try to keep in touch with them as much as possible, but it's still tough. I do not regret leaving, because I know it was in the best interest for me and my family, but I truly miss the people I worked with and being there to help protect them as they protected me.
As some of you may have heard, HPPD was just involved in their second police involved shooting of the year. Obviously, this involved a couple of my friends who are now on administrative leave (which is standard). The first shooting was in March and involved a great officer that left for some of the same reasons I did, but came back the PD as I resigned. He filled one of the empty slots on the same patrol team I left. He arrived at a domestic disturbance one night and witnessed a female attacking her boyfriend with a box cutter. After neither subject complied, he was left no choice but to protect the man who was not armed. The shooting last night involved two officers that arrived to a home invasion in progress. I can only disclose what the media has released, but after a subject exited armed with a gun and made threatening movements at the officers, they... again, were left with no choice.
The reason I write this is because something inside me feels guilty for not being there. That could have been me, and I ask myself, "If it was me, would I have made the right decision?" Every part of me says that I would have, and for some reason I feel like I should still be in that role to help protect my fellow officers. The world is getting more violent, as is this particular city. I actually saw it with my own eyes as I left. I am not the only one with a family and child, many of these officers have a wife and more than one child. I fear badly that one of my friends that are an asset to society, will get injured or killed by one of these that are a menace to society.
It bothers me bad to watch the media display their unbelievable ways of making a story out of the information they have. Let me clear something up for you all. The ways of these uneducated criminals and the families that raised them are this: Information from word of mouth is fact. I can't tell you how many times I witnessed full out physical attacks occur because somebody's mother-in-law's baby sister's cousin Lori said that somebody's boyfriend was up at the show with some "tramp" or "My Aunt said my brother ate my hot dog". What the crap? As bad as this angered me, I had to try to explain logic to someone who wasn't capable of understanding logic. Fox 8, my most hated news channel for reasons I'd have to tell several police stories to explain, decided to put the mother of this victim on the news. Now keep in mind, they put her on TV for a story. They put her on knowing that she will say something that causes tension and cause the unknowing public to believe that there is a possibility of excessive force. She was interviewed saying that her baby was shot in the back. When someone is shot in the back, it implies that they were running, retreating, or surrendering. Why can't they just take the facts from the report and let the system of investigation and forensics work? It'd be like me putting in a report, "Mrs Stevens reports that she was attacked by Mr. Stevens. Mr. Stevens said he didn't do it, so we are continuing the investigation elsewhere.". Since when do we believe people and what they say?
I just ask that you put your assumptions aside when dealing with the media. They will attempt to put the police at fault, because that's what causes people to watch. They want citizens to watch and say, "Wow, more corrupt police... what is the world coming to." When you see a video on the news claiming "police brutality", how do we know that this guy didn't have a knife in his right hand he refused to drop? You never know when yours or your families' life might be in the hands of one of these officers. You have no choice but to trust them. Please raise your kids to understand that the police are friends, not foes. I can't tell you how many times I got the "Be good or that officer will put you in jail" comment in a store. That irritated me, because now this kid is scared of me when I wanted nothing more to but lean down and give him a Jr. Police Officer badge (which now is no good). Remember, officers RARELY get a kind gesture. I'd guess that 90% of those that come in contact with an officer is very much not pleased to see them.
Do I miss it? Sometimes. I miss the excitement, the adrenaline, the stories, and the people that worked along my side. I think God took me through that phase as an important part of my life... as medication needed to learn more about how to raise my child, protect my family, and choose my battles as they present themselves. Next time you see an officer grabbing a quick meal, don't think the same thing that many used to say to me ("Who's protecting the city?") How about buying their lunch for doing what they do, because it is not easy... it does not pay well...not just anyone can do it... and I promise you that they miss more lunches and take more abbreviated lunches than you'll ever know...
7 comments:
great post matty-
I gained such a new respect for the Po-Po when you became one. But I gotta tell you I was one who FREAKED out when we got an encode in the ER "officer down." (Mind you on one occasion someone got a little excited b/c a po-po fell and twisted his knee on a foot chase).
Another time I can remember being the primary nurse of a trauma where a guy was shot by HPPD. I can remember having a hard time during resuscitation b/c I knew the story. I knew he had a gun pointed at an officer and I couldn't help but think "that could have been my brother. This man who's life I'm getting paid to attempt to save- could have shot MY brother." (I still did my part, though knowing death was inevitable)
honestly, i went from one of those people who thought officers were just out to give poor little me a ticket b/c i was way too into my music to pay attention to my speed; to someone who could truly appreciate what they put up with on a day to day basis. I find myself (not here in Kenya, but at home) smiling at every officer and wanting to say "thanks". I now know that we Americans take our police officers for granted, b/c they are super corrupt here. They really do pull you, tell you that you were talking on your cell phone but for a bribe they will let you slide. 8,000 shillings later you're narrowing escaping the african prisons. (Don't worry- not been pulled. Hit but not pulled) :)
I believe that our officers don't get the credit they deserve. And no matter how stinky the political mess gets- America has a democracy- so thank the Lord for that b/c there are many countries that don't have that privilege.
Sorry 'bout my rant....that was a doosy to read, eh. I love you so much and while I'm SOOO thankful for what he PD does, i'm glad I don't have to lay awake at night or pace the floors of the ER waiting to see if my brother has been shot after encodes. (But in a sick way- I miss you cuffing ol' Tina to the stretcher b/c she was gettin' a lil' outta control with your sis)
Lub, lub, lub-
wow... it looks much longer when you post it. SORRY!! Should've just written you an email :)
I have felt that surging frustration all over again after reading your post bro. I will never forget all those stories you shared and the way you guys have been treated. I've probably shared those with dozens of people over the past few years. (the frustration and challenges to your line of work)
Matt, I have learned a very powerful thing in the last year: "It takes less work to believe a lie, than to seek the Truth." I think that most people accept what is right in front of them as fact, because they are too lazy, too naive, too scared of what it might require of them to LEARN the truth in any situation. And we don't even realize we do that. It usually is harmless and little at first: Someone says something like, "I READ in the paper that Thomasville City schools were going to stop having Friday night games because of violence after the football games." Well, if this comes out of the mouth of someone older or someone we have a small level of trust in, we might find ourselves believing it. Now, the TRUTH might have been that the school was canceling the next game due to the players getting suspended for fighting the other players. The paper may have reported that the rest of the season was canceled, and then your "friend" told you that ALL sporting events were going to be canceled due to violence. You see, there might have been SOME truth, but if it isn't ALL truth, then it's ALL lie.
I thank God for people who serve others. I have an admiration for the servants in this world. My biggest hero was the greatest servant who ever lived and I love seeing that trait in others.
~Chris
HA--I was a little confused at first...I thought the title read "poo poo" so I was looking for how you were going to talk about baby poo after talking about the PD. OOPS.
Sooooo
I went back and read it over...and can I just say that I am so proud of you...your service and your honesty. I think anything in the public service realm--especially police officers and what they have to deal with EVERY DAY--is a very noble calling.
And believe me...I watch the "news" on TV assuming that most things are not really a true as they make it seem. Scandal sells, I guess.
Give Beth a hug for me...and Levi :-) And heck...give yourself a hug too...HA!
I forget so often that you were an PO, mostly b/c you're a dork.
Seriously, I do appreciate police officers, even though the site of a cruiser ALWAYS makes me tap my breaks, even if I'm not speeding.
Anyhoo,...I'm feelin' hungry. Who's up for donuts?
I despise Channel 8! I think they are mostly obnoxious and LOVE to hear themselves talk (sorry if I offend anyone, but they really do STINK...I can smell them as soon as I turn the TV to their channel). I stick with Channel 12 news.
As for you babe...I, above anyone, couldn't be prouder of who you are now and who you were as a PO-PO. I feel safer with you than anyone else and I'm so thankful that you'll be there to protect my baby boy (and future children, God willing). Nothing makes me angrier, besides negligent parents, than people who try and buck the police. Especially when it can be a potentially dangerous situation. I love how you encouraged everyone to raise their children with an awareness of the goodness of police and challenged them to buy a cop dinner. It is time this society started respecting those who protect us. I like living in my safe world...those reading this post, I'm sure, have no idea what goes on after dark...and we like it that way. We have police to thank for that safety and for the peaceful nights we have in our warm 'lil beds.
Great post! That's very sweet that you said I was a good beat partner even though I made you go in the "crap house." We miss you but are glad that you are happy...and hopefully I'm on my way out soon!
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